So this week I will be going to my best friend's wedding. HE was my first true friend when I was ripped from the comfort of my concrete haven of Brooklyn, to the unknown suburbs of Long Island. From that one drama class at Nassau Community College back in 2000, he has grown to be one of my most cherished friendships. This milestone is making me look at all my friendships and connections I've made in my life. The web of people I have met in my life through jobs, trips and random circumstances have shaped me. And in that reflection, I see those friends that are in the rear view mirror. The friends that get lost from time, distance or misunderstanding. As our lives grow and evolve we see that some friends are for lifetime and some are for a season, the key to know how to identify who's who.
When we are younger we cling on to our friendship for identify, comfort and guidance. We have our friends from school, camp, dance school, church and etc. As we get older and get into our grown up lives our friendships stem from college, work, vacations and through shifts in life such as marriage and babies. With all these connections, one is bound to lose a few friends along the way. However, that may not be a bad thing. If you really take the time, you will notice the role each friendship plays or played in your life at certain points in you life.
I've been fortunate enough in my life to have wonderful friends. Even when you don't talk for a while the connection is still very strong. But then there are friends that only lasted a season. The season of Spring break, I would roll with the same crew. We were loud, wild and full of energy that lead to situations and experiences that I would NEVER share with my Mom. But the friendships weren't substantial enough to be long term. Although we had our fun, there wasn't enough to keep us connected, which I had to find out the hard way. With each major transition of my life like jobs and school, have made connections with people that have exposed me to new things and impacted my world. These connections although they may have only lasted the length of my employment or a couple of semesters, have helped to shape me. Even when those people were doing something I didn't do myself, watching them taught me an aspect of life I needed to know.
Some friends are in your life to teach lessons. Some are to expand your view of the world. Some friends are there to get you drunk when you just need to let loose. Some friends are there to listen to you complain about your annoying boss. And then there are the friends that can refill your spirit in time of immense pain and sorrow. Its important to understand not every friend is for everything in your life. Its not a bad, thing is just a fact of life.
So I say all this to say, tell your friends you love them. Without them you wouldn't be who you are. They may not be perfect but they are all yours and the time you have had together is significant. And when you think about former friendships, even the ones that ended poorly, smile. That person made an impact, it just wasn't meant to be forever. You had good times till they weren't and you are in a good place now without them. Let go of any animosity attached to those people, cause it wasted energy to could be sharing with your true friends. Until next time.......
Miss Amina Diva
